I’ve recently been having some memory flashbacks from when I was plagued by health issues and was misanthropic. I would create situations for my own personal edification where I would mentally run through a batch of challenging problems I gave myself within measured amounts of time.
These phases of mine were things like how to cook certain types of food, what manner of philosophy to silently debate with myself, or who had done what and why to assist me with life’s problems then recently. No matter was too trivial, but my key intake parameter was that too much self reflection was to be avoided at all costs. Time was always measured by me during these heady years of contemplation and some remorse. I remember slicing up time intervals neatly and also at times unevenly; seemingly chaotic, but all the while my division of physicality was unfortunately intentional on my part.
Life was a timelock.